at home and reflecting...

We have been to the ER three times in the span of Spencer's life. The first time was the "first fever" moment of our little girl's life, where I totally reacted, was crying in the waiting room, thinking these were the short days of my Spencer's life. That was 1.5 years ago. Then, Matt had to visit the ER w/ Spencer after a nasty run in with a fire ant pile. And, you all know, the third.

When I looked at Spencer's legs on Sunday, I was taken back by how deformed her legs were. It was totally not normal and I was sure there was something wrong. As the day went on, and the disorder continued to progress in Spencer's little body, I began to slowly lose it. The, almost, breaking point for me was when the three nurses came in, for the second time, to draw 3 more viles of Spencer's blood. Spencer's reaction to this was simply "why!" as she just lay there, as she could not move her lower body. It broke my heart.

We had JUST come from a very powerful church service where I went forward to receive forgiveness and prayer, crying out to Jesus. When Spencer was looking into my eyes on Sunday, as they were drawing her blood, in so much pain, I clearly heard the Lord say "talk to Me". It's funny, when people are in the hospital, you are constantly praying for them, and you know so many other people are doing the same thing for "those people". But, when you're in the shoes of the people in crisis, it's totally different. At least I thought.

When I heard the Lord, Spencer didn't stop crying. The afternoon didn't get shorter, but the Lord gave me a peace to get through the day. A peace to be the mommy and be strong for my little girl. As the night was "restless" for Spencer (that Sunday night), her fussiness only lasted a moment or two. I came to find out yesterday, that my pastor's wife was woken all night, being called to pray for Spencer. I truely believe the shortness in Spencer's discomfort was interceded by Teresa's prayers, and that truely comes from the Lord.

You see, I tell you this not to say that this has been easy, because it hasn't. And, we're not over this yet, but walking through this with a body of believers has made me all the stronger and managable (for Matt ;). I pray Spencer will not have lasting effects from this and all clears up, but for right now, I'm so thankful there are folks praying for Spencer, Matt and myself, daily.

**Spencer continues to heal, but this disorder definatly is taking it's time. As of tonight, her arm has swelled a bit and she's still not quite comfortable. But, her spirit and spunk are a 100% improvement from Sunday. We had a follow up appointment this morning, and all is looking well. But, she'll have to have blood work for the next 6-8 weeks (at least) and urinalysis weekly, as well. Thank goodness we did the potty training! Please keep praying for her, because we're not out of the woods yet.**